A major experience of young adolescents with older youth is that of the
adolescent girl who is dating an older boy. Receiving "sex education" through direct
encounters with those who are older is a common experience for adolescent girls, and
to some extent for adolescent boys.
Girls commonly date someone their own age or
older; boys usually date someone their own age or younger. The cases to follow deal
with young adolescent girls/older boy encounters, and are cases in which the girl views
her date as more or less exploitative.
At fourteen I went steady with a senior boy, the wildest boy in high
school, bar none. I said no and no again, but having no experience
at all with physical passion, I had no idea how to handle it. Why we
never engaged in intercourse, I'll never know, except my conscience
almost killed me.
He being older, and just being a boy with a lot more experience, had
the upper hand. He was out for a good time and also to get what he
could. I did not know this at the time. It was not long until he had
me wrapped around his finger. He was very experienced and
relaxed. He knew how to handle me to get what he wanted.
He told me that me would be going to a movie that night, but he
had arranged for the use of a friend's empty house for the occasion.
For the first time in our relationship, I was really afraid of him.
Adolescent-Adult Encounters
We divide the sexual encounters involving adolescents and adults (other than
parents) into two basic categories. The first deals with direct contact with adults in
the form of observing adult behavior or being in intimate contact with adults. In the
second section we deal with the impact of adult-sponsored social institutions on the
sexual life of the adolescent, such as the school, the church, et cetera. The two
following cases deal with adolescent encounters with aggressive adults. The first case
involves the more common experience of an adolescent girl and an aggressive adult
male. The second case involves the much less common experience of an adolescent boy
and an aggressive adult female.
It was my sophomore year in high school that this occasion
occurred, the likes of which I shall never forget. I had met a young
man in his early twenties. He was not only good looking, but held
an impressive position in the business of the community. Since I
had heard that he had made a pass at or asked out most every girl
where I worked at one time or another, I was concerned as to why
he had never made a pass at me. Shortly after my concern had
become almost an obsession, he asked me out.
My parents were not
in favor of my going out with him and were quite shaken up. My
pride was at stake and I just had to show them that I could "take
care of myself." In the course of many activities that day, he
explained to me that he had a strong interest in photography and
developed his own pictures.
We stopped by a camera shop to
purchase some supplies. Our next activity, he explained, was to
drop the supplies at his apartment. Aha, I thought, this is it. I was
correct. He politely asked if I cared to see some of his works.