"Group dating" (mixed parties), which begins for some in preadolescence, involves more young people during adolescence. Parties include more heterosexual involvement than they did in preadolescence, and more of the parties are "make-out" parties, meaning that physical contact, kissing, fondling, petting, and sometimes coitus are involved. Eighth grade was when I began kissing a boy with some affection. Parties used to be just 'make-out' parties. Our parents would take us to the party; we would go to the basement and neck; and then the parents would take us home again. The combination of a changed philosophy, an automobile at your disposal, a homogeneous group of athletes who did everything together in school, and the omnipresent group of girls who were always there to cheer you on, changed our casual group dating to a type of select group dating. This select group dating led us to the 'make-out' party. These parties would, without exception, be unchaperoned...
In a sense, group dating is a pre-driver's license kind of dating, in that boys do
not have the transportation considered essential to paired dating, particularly in the
country and in small cities.
At that time, very few boys in my class had driver's licenses, whereas
the upper classmen did. This made paired dating for the boys in my
class almost impossible until they reached the age of fifteen.
If one is to avoid shock in group dating, it is important that one participate in a
group whose members are at a similar stage of development. It can be infuriating for
the experienced adolescent to find themself with a naive date. It isn't always the girl
who is the naive group dater.
I was often considered the life of the party because I was always
getting something rolling, but the real reason was that I was
frightened and didn't want to neck. There was often liquor at the
parties, which was used to spike the cokes that the parents brought
down. My mother would always call to see if the parents were going
to be home, but she didn't realize that this didn't ensure a nice little
party. At the last party I was ever to attend, my steady was really
upset with my coldness, and must have decided that since I wasn't
cooperating anyway, he would really teach me a thing or two. He
said something about going to get a bottle of pop, so I went with
him into an out-of-the-way room where he proceeded to corner me. I
had absolutely no idea what he had in mind. He tore off my blouse
(ripping off most of the buttons) and got me down on the floor.
Needless to say, there was no affection or any playfulness. I have
never been a weak, helpless little girl, so I got out of there without
too much trouble. The only damage was psychological.
Parties were one long make-out session; no sooner would we get
there than the lights would go out and couples would race for the
darkest, most comfortable corners, and I always found myself in a
pretty good one. Here I discovered I still had some catching up to
do. Making out was a lot of fun, but that's as far as I cared to go-
not my steady though. She would always like lying on top of me,
and that was okay, I decided, but when she took my hand and
placed it up her blouse...
In about two hours, most of the people at the party were
intoxicated. My date was one of these persons. She suggested that
we go upstairs, to one of the unoccupied bedrooms. At first we just
sat there and talked, but then we engaged in 'making out' and some
light petting. While doing this, my date became very sexually
aroused. I then proceeded to get into the prone position, we
engaged in simulated intercourse (humping). This was the first
time in my life that I was so sexually aroused that I had an
ejaculation (other than through masturbation).
The next case illustrates a different type of group dating; one involving older
adolescent boys. The group of boys expanded to become a mixed group of pairs, but
with the boys in charge.
By the time we had started our junior year, we were in the market
for a little more permanent or stable relationship. Our group of
boys did everything together. It wasn't long before each one of the
guys had found a girl. From then on the group was twelve instead
of six, but still doing everything together. The girls were nice, but
were well chosen so that they could be swayed to our way of
thinking. They were. The relationship between boy and girl grew
more intense as the weeks and months went by. Within a few
months all of the couples were engaging in coitus.