Some of the mothers experienced fear of a perverted sexual interest
from the amount of eroticism stimulated by the nursing process, and
several non-nursing mothers who had nursed previous babies refused to
nurse again because of concern and guilt over their erotic feelings.
If
the husband felt that nursing was disgusting or harmful, it discouraged
many women from nursing and they had little erotic interest for
months. Ironically, these men were denied sex relations longer than if
their wives had suckled their babies. The closeness, the pleasurable
feelings from the relationship in the long run may benefit infant,
mother, and husband, too.
The discovery of a relationship between suckling and eroticism is
not new. The Peruvian, Mochica Indians of 900 A.D., left all sorts of
pottery decorated with sexual themes, a mother having intercourse while
nursing her baby, for example.
Nipple stimulation resulting in uterine
contractions was known in early history. Leonardo Da Vinci in his
drawings depicted a nerve leading from the nipples to the uterus.
(Lowry, 1970). As early as 1931, Dickinson and Beam in their study of a
thousand marriages reported on orgasms resulting from suckling an
infant.
Not only the amount but also the nature of stimulation between the
infant and mother is of consequence. When the infant is suckling he reciprocates
by putting fingers into his mother's mouth; she responds by
moving her lips on his fingers.
He moves his fingers; she responds with
a smile. All the while he studies her face with rapt attention. (Spitz,
1949, p. 291). Infants pat the mother's breast while sucking, pat her
face, turn a cheek to be kissed, clasp her around the neck, lay their
cheek on hers, hug, and bite. "Such little scenes can be observed in
endless variations in any mother-child couple." (Spitz, 1949, p. 291).
Some of the expressions of affection through patting and hugging may be
spontaneous, while others are learned in the infant's encounters with
mother and other adults. (Shirley, 1933).
If a responsive woman is the mother of a non-cuddling infant considerable
challenge is held out to her adaptability, as with a cuddly
baby and a non-responsive mother. Some mothers make it clear that
breast feeding is at best a duty and is not physically nor emotionally
pleasurable. If the suckling experience seems unworthy or shameful to
her, the mother may not be able to acknowledge it or may feel the need
to find acceptable excuses. In the United States illness or physical
inadequacy are commonly accepted as "good" reasons for not suckling infants.
In contemporary United States' culture, the breasts play a more
prominent part in the erotic encounters of adults than they do in suckling
experiences with infants. In societies where suckling is generally
accepted, infant-mother separation is not easily tolerated by
either participant.
In speaking to Ganda women, Ainsworth (1963) relates
that a number of mothers said they enjoyed breast feeding, and
one confessed with embarrassment that it was so satisfactory to her
that though her child was over twelve months of age she was reluctant
to wean him.
Mathews, in describing the infant-mother sensory contact
among the Yorubas of Nigeria (as reported in Newton and Newton, 1967),
reports that a strict breast feeding routine would be difficult to attain
because the mothers, determined and obstinate, were not easily
separated from their babies for long.
The baby remains from birth until
about the second year of life almost constantly in close physical
contact with the mother who feeds it at irregular intervals, usually
determined by the infant's crying.