Stephane describes this process of giving away your power using the phrase "leaking sexual energy." Women leak sexual energy by looking for sexual validation in clubs, whereas guys leak it by masturbating to porn. This is especially crucial if these things happen within a relationship.
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"Porn is definitely leaking, plus it trains the man to give his power away to women. Porn is the number one training ground for this kind of imbalance, for training one's self to give power away to women. |
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Most approach anxiety is programmed in through that channel. In the days before porn, there was SHYNESS, it wasn't as debilitating as we see in the men of today. Also, porn will cause one to attract lower energy fields of lust, shame, guilt, pride, apathy, depression, anger, madonna/whore, etc." -Stephane |
A guy who puts women on pedestals will give away his power to them. He will allow women to walk all over him, treat him badly and he will jump to meet any need a woman has. This reinforces the "nice guy" attitude and is counter-productive in creating sexual attraction.
The Emotional Connection within Sex
The sex in porn is often very physical and leaves out the crucial element that has been proven to make women have more powerful orgasms: emotional connection.
Women that feel a strong emotional connection with a man (in addition to the physical part) are more relaxed and their biology responds better, allowing them to enjoy sex more.
In Stephane's Squirt Training DVD, he explains how he helps his girlfriends achieve full body squirting orgasms using various massage techniques and pressure points.
A key element in his training her to squirt is the emotional connection that he and his girlfriend must have. A woman must feel safe and secure in order to be relaxed enough for her to have a full body orgasm.
You can see a short video of what a full body orgasm looks like by visiting this link (Definitely Not Safe for Work): Ideagasms Instructional Squirt DVD .
When you masturbate to porn, you don't personally know the women in the videos, so you are training yourself to orgasm based on their physical attractiveness and downplaying the emotional connection element.
You are also training yourself to orgasm by looking at a woman rather than being with a woman.
Do you have problems holding eye contact?
I know the times when I was masturbating to porn, I had trouble holding eye contact with women even when I consciously tried to hold it.
The reason for poor eye contact is because when we see an attractive woman, subconsciously our brain references some of the recent memories of attractive women which point to us jerking off to porn, which then causes us to feel guilt and shame.
Then we think "Oh no, I better look away so she doesn't feel like I'm gawking at her like a sex object."
That's our own projection of reality, it's not what she will is actually thinking.
For some guys, this may not affect them much since they have these areas covered naturally, live in their own reality, and porn is just a side thing to do in their spare time.
For guys that are still getting their inner game together, it can be an unnecessary addiction that drains our sexual energy, confidence, and power.